Wednesday, November 2, 2011
Saturday, October 8, 2011
In The Jungle The Mighty Jungle
We took the kids to the corn maze again. It is my absolute favorite field trip. On the bus ride there, when all the kids start screaming at the top of their lungs, you know we are passing horses or cows in fields on the side of the road.
Once we get there, they all drink their drinks really fast so they can catch bugs and put them in the empty bottles.
They all also seem to think that we are out in the wild. Throughout the entire corn maze, I had to keep telling my group that no animals were chasing us, nor were they going to jump out from the corn at us.
I saw a kid trying to climb through the corn instead of going down the path and I said, "Cheater!"
Timothy turns to Deshawn and says, "Ohmygod there are cheetahs in here."
Once we get there, they all drink their drinks really fast so they can catch bugs and put them in the empty bottles.
They all also seem to think that we are out in the wild. Throughout the entire corn maze, I had to keep telling my group that no animals were chasing us, nor were they going to jump out from the corn at us.
I saw a kid trying to climb through the corn instead of going down the path and I said, "Cheater!"
Timothy turns to Deshawn and says, "Ohmygod there are cheetahs in here."
Wednesday, September 28, 2011
New From Milton Bradley!
I think everyone who reads this is my friend on facebook so this is a repeat.
But two girls were fighting the other day. One of the boys came into my classroom later and told me that it wasn't a real fight. He said the girls are all playing a new game called "Custody." In this game they fight about imaginary children and baby daddys.
:(
But two girls were fighting the other day. One of the boys came into my classroom later and told me that it wasn't a real fight. He said the girls are all playing a new game called "Custody." In this game they fight about imaginary children and baby daddys.
:(
So Much Laughing
Yesterday, my third period class was ON FIRE with the jokes. They probably won't be as funny here, but whatever I'm still laughing.
1. We were doing a foldable booklet. At one point, Daneisha picks up her folded paper, flips it open like a phone and says, "Hello? Oh, hey. Yeah, Miss Vinson just teachin' us how to fold paper. Sure. Okay, bye."
2. Everyday, we watch CNN Student News. Jerome says, "Is it time for CNN Studaloos yet?"
3. While they were working on their booklets, it got eerily quiet. Desean looks up from his work with a panicked look. Somebody coughs and he goes, " OH THANK GOD I THOUGHT I WENT DEAF."
1. We were doing a foldable booklet. At one point, Daneisha picks up her folded paper, flips it open like a phone and says, "Hello? Oh, hey. Yeah, Miss Vinson just teachin' us how to fold paper. Sure. Okay, bye."
2. Everyday, we watch CNN Student News. Jerome says, "Is it time for CNN Studaloos yet?"
3. While they were working on their booklets, it got eerily quiet. Desean looks up from his work with a panicked look. Somebody coughs and he goes, " OH THANK GOD I THOUGHT I WENT DEAF."
Wednesday, September 14, 2011
I Haven't Yelled At Students Yet This Year
Oh, but I have yelled at adults. We spoke of Captain Obvious the other day. He actually came up to me and apologized and said I was right so I'm not going to get him fired. (I did find out his salary isn't amazing or anything, so I'm mollified.) So while I'm going to continue not listening to his dumb advice and checking him when he's getting condescending, he is no longer my current archnemesis.
No, no. Her name is Smarty Pants. She works for the Turnaround Company. Her supposed job is to work with the Language Arts teachers on their curriculum. (She is the one who, at the end of last year, told me that I shouldn't make my kids read.) Anyways, today she wanted to work with the Social Studies teachers.
Imagine you are the parent of a rambunctious five year old, and some "expert" who doesn't have children makes you sit through a two hour powerpoint and role-playing session in which you are informed of the concept of "time-out." Around slide two, you want to scream at her, DO YOU THINK I AM THE DUMBEST PERSON ALIVE? You want to ask her, You realize I've had this child for five years, right? You are curious as to how she could possibly think you have never heard of this before. You can't believe someone gets paid actual money to tell you these things. (After her presentation, you'll get another one on why you shouldn't let your child drink 8 sodas a day.)
Anyway, she does this completely bullshit presentation, at one point outright saying that social studies teachers "resist" teaching vocabulary. You are absolutely right, Smarty Pants. I will do an entire lesson on monarchy, democracy, theocracy, etc. and if these 11 year olds don't already know those words then screw them! I don't care if you've never heard the word Mesopotamia, I'm just going to keep talking! It's not like I have to teach them or anything!
Well, anyways, I was super pissed off, so I just started ignoring her powerpoint and writing in my notebook.
THIS WOMAN comes over to me and says in her bitchy teacher voice, "Excuse me, but if you need to leave, you are welcome to."
No! Of course not! I love that you have an entire powerpoint to insult me! Please! Please give me more!
Actually I just said, "Oh, no, I am juuuuust fine." Because you know, even if she thinks it, I actually am not a child.
No, no. Her name is Smarty Pants. She works for the Turnaround Company. Her supposed job is to work with the Language Arts teachers on their curriculum. (She is the one who, at the end of last year, told me that I shouldn't make my kids read.) Anyways, today she wanted to work with the Social Studies teachers.
Imagine you are the parent of a rambunctious five year old, and some "expert" who doesn't have children makes you sit through a two hour powerpoint and role-playing session in which you are informed of the concept of "time-out." Around slide two, you want to scream at her, DO YOU THINK I AM THE DUMBEST PERSON ALIVE? You want to ask her, You realize I've had this child for five years, right? You are curious as to how she could possibly think you have never heard of this before. You can't believe someone gets paid actual money to tell you these things. (After her presentation, you'll get another one on why you shouldn't let your child drink 8 sodas a day.)
Anyway, she does this completely bullshit presentation, at one point outright saying that social studies teachers "resist" teaching vocabulary. You are absolutely right, Smarty Pants. I will do an entire lesson on monarchy, democracy, theocracy, etc. and if these 11 year olds don't already know those words then screw them! I don't care if you've never heard the word Mesopotamia, I'm just going to keep talking! It's not like I have to teach them or anything!
Well, anyways, I was super pissed off, so I just started ignoring her powerpoint and writing in my notebook.
THIS WOMAN comes over to me and says in her bitchy teacher voice, "Excuse me, but if you need to leave, you are welcome to."
No! Of course not! I love that you have an entire powerpoint to insult me! Please! Please give me more!
Actually I just said, "Oh, no, I am juuuuust fine." Because you know, even if she thinks it, I actually am not a child.
Duh, the Hospital Van
Last Friday we learned about 9/11 (these kids were 2 years old you guys!) and we made appreciation cards for Firefighters, EMTs and police officers in our city.
I'm walking around the room and I overhear:
Student: How do you spell amalamps?
Other Student: A-M-A-L-A-M-P-S
Me: WHAT? What are you talking about?
Both students start making siren noises and look at me like I'm a moron.
I'm walking around the room and I overhear:
Student: How do you spell amalamps?
Other Student: A-M-A-L-A-M-P-S
Me: WHAT? What are you talking about?
Both students start making siren noises and look at me like I'm a moron.
Sunday, September 11, 2011
Captain Obvious and Nepotism
I'm the Team Leader for the 7th grade team. We have a 2nd year Language Arts teacher (Ms. K) who is a very nice person and a very hard worker. Sometimes in this school, niceness is seen as weakness by the children. So, coupled with her inexperience and being incredibly nice, sometimes the children give her problems.
We have a new guy at our school and his job title is Intervention Specialist. There was no interview process for this position because I would have applied. He is very condescending to Ms. K and does nothing to intervene when things are going wrong in her classroom. His job also appears to be walking around and telling everyone else what THEIR job is.
We have had 5 full days of school. After the 4th day, Mr. Specialist told Ms. K that "y'all won't be having any more problems out of Raquan. I've talked to him." Oh, thanks Mr. Specialist. I taught Raquan all of last year and have had hundreds of "talks" with him, but I'm glad you are here to save the day. (Unsurprisingly, Raquan was misbehaving less than an hour after Mr. Specialist's little talk.)
On Friday, Ms. K came into my room during lunch on the verge of tears. Her 2nd period had been very disruptive. At one point, two boys were chasing each other around the classroom and knocked over her entire bookshelf. RAQUAN was throwing pencils at her.
Mr. Specialist comes into my room as Ms. K is recounting the story for me. THIS GUY has the nerve to look at me and go, "Well, these kids don't give YOU any problems DO they, Miss Vinson?"
"Um, what does that have to do with anything?"
He realized I was a little hostile. So, he turns to Ms. K and asks her IF SHE HAS EVER CONSIDERED DETENTION.
ARE YOU KIDDING ME, GUY?! They pay you to come suggest to us that we should give detention?!
So, I pretty much let him have it. I wish I could have recorded it or something because it was brilliant. But the gist was something about how as a teacher, Ms. K shouldn't even have to be worried about the punishment for a child who is THROWING THINGS AT HER. In my opinion, that jumps right into the hands of the administration, or at the very least, THE INTERVENTION SPECIALIST. Am I wrong?
When they don't show up for detention (they never do), then what happens? Call the parent? What about when none of the phone numbers we have work? What then? And while we're going through all these steps, he's still THROWING THINGS AT HIS TEACHER. She shouldn't have to deal with that. At all.
He then proceeded to tell me that whatever happened was "up to the team." WHAT? The "team" is the 4 teachers that this student has. We are all teaching while this is going on. Should I stop teaching my class to walk down the hall and deal with this?
So, after this lunch fight, I was incredibly heated. Ms. K said she wondered what Mr. Specialist's background was in. I was curious so I looked him up on Facebook.
1. He has an Associate's Degree in Art from a community college.
2. His previous job was at a Wine Shop for about 7 years.
3. There are pictures of his baby daughter with our Turnaround Director.
4. He has the same last name as the girlfriend of our Turnaround Director.
Now, I'm no detective, but I'm calling BULLSHIT on this one. Tomorrow, I'm going to see if someone can sneak me this guy's salary information. If he is making any more than what a hall monitor is making, I'm going to start some serious shit.
We have a new guy at our school and his job title is Intervention Specialist. There was no interview process for this position because I would have applied. He is very condescending to Ms. K and does nothing to intervene when things are going wrong in her classroom. His job also appears to be walking around and telling everyone else what THEIR job is.
We have had 5 full days of school. After the 4th day, Mr. Specialist told Ms. K that "y'all won't be having any more problems out of Raquan. I've talked to him." Oh, thanks Mr. Specialist. I taught Raquan all of last year and have had hundreds of "talks" with him, but I'm glad you are here to save the day. (Unsurprisingly, Raquan was misbehaving less than an hour after Mr. Specialist's little talk.)
On Friday, Ms. K came into my room during lunch on the verge of tears. Her 2nd period had been very disruptive. At one point, two boys were chasing each other around the classroom and knocked over her entire bookshelf. RAQUAN was throwing pencils at her.
Mr. Specialist comes into my room as Ms. K is recounting the story for me. THIS GUY has the nerve to look at me and go, "Well, these kids don't give YOU any problems DO they, Miss Vinson?"
"Um, what does that have to do with anything?"
He realized I was a little hostile. So, he turns to Ms. K and asks her IF SHE HAS EVER CONSIDERED DETENTION.
ARE YOU KIDDING ME, GUY?! They pay you to come suggest to us that we should give detention?!
So, I pretty much let him have it. I wish I could have recorded it or something because it was brilliant. But the gist was something about how as a teacher, Ms. K shouldn't even have to be worried about the punishment for a child who is THROWING THINGS AT HER. In my opinion, that jumps right into the hands of the administration, or at the very least, THE INTERVENTION SPECIALIST. Am I wrong?
When they don't show up for detention (they never do), then what happens? Call the parent? What about when none of the phone numbers we have work? What then? And while we're going through all these steps, he's still THROWING THINGS AT HIS TEACHER. She shouldn't have to deal with that. At all.
He then proceeded to tell me that whatever happened was "up to the team." WHAT? The "team" is the 4 teachers that this student has. We are all teaching while this is going on. Should I stop teaching my class to walk down the hall and deal with this?
So, after this lunch fight, I was incredibly heated. Ms. K said she wondered what Mr. Specialist's background was in. I was curious so I looked him up on Facebook.
1. He has an Associate's Degree in Art from a community college.
2. His previous job was at a Wine Shop for about 7 years.
3. There are pictures of his baby daughter with our Turnaround Director.
4. He has the same last name as the girlfriend of our Turnaround Director.
Now, I'm no detective, but I'm calling BULLSHIT on this one. Tomorrow, I'm going to see if someone can sneak me this guy's salary information. If he is making any more than what a hall monitor is making, I'm going to start some serious shit.
Tuesday, September 6, 2011
Thursday, September 1, 2011
Oh, Except This Guy.
This year I'm doing my counseling internship on Wednesdays. The lady I'd always wanted to intern with retired last year. So I'm stuck with a guy who has been a counselor for many, many years but has only been at my school for about a semester. He wants to be all experty on things I already know.
Anyways, the other day at our meeting we were both discussing how we'd been without power for 4 days because of Hurricane Irene. He then, in all seriousness, begins to warn me about December 21, 2012.
"Well, Vinson. It's good that you're learning how to survive. After 2012, things are going to be different in this world. They way we live now, it won't be like that anymore."
"Um, sure."
"I'm serious. This is good practice for you to get used to living in a different way. It's going to happen."
Only 599 hours of internship left!
Anyways, the other day at our meeting we were both discussing how we'd been without power for 4 days because of Hurricane Irene. He then, in all seriousness, begins to warn me about December 21, 2012.
"Well, Vinson. It's good that you're learning how to survive. After 2012, things are going to be different in this world. They way we live now, it won't be like that anymore."
"Um, sure."
"I'm serious. This is good practice for you to get used to living in a different way. It's going to happen."
Only 599 hours of internship left!
Nothing Interesting
So we started 2 days late because of Hurricane Irene. I've had two days of school and they've been fine.
A WHOLE BUNCH of kids have transferred, so all of my classes are at about 15 kids. Which is pretty great.
Things are good.
Don't worry. It won't last long.
A WHOLE BUNCH of kids have transferred, so all of my classes are at about 15 kids. Which is pretty great.
Things are good.
Don't worry. It won't last long.
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