Parent Quote of the Year

"I used to think that all these bad kids were scared of their parents, and if their parents only knew about their behavior, it would stop. I just met some other parents and I realized they are worse than the kids are!"

This Man Is Crazy

Today, with half an hour left in the school day, we hear this announcement: "Teachers and students. This is an early announcement. Whoever is interested in playing on the school basketball team, please come downstairs RIGHT NOW. Thank you."

WHAT. Of course, the entire school wants to go. I made my kids (15 out of my 30 kids wanted to go) and I walked them in a line down the stairs into chaos. I just walked away. Is he serious?! It can't be an after-school meeting? You know, to make sure they are serious and not just trying to skip class.

I mean, i hate to point out the obvious...but damn.

I Have A New Student

His name is Jihad.

Times When It's Okay To Kill Someone

So, seriously, I don't give a shit about grades and tests and making our goals about standardized scores or whatever. I really just wish I could go in everyday, say something controversial and have my kids talk about it.

Today we read a news article about 3 teenage boys who broke into a man's house during the middle of the day. When they realized he was there, they tried to go back out the window. He fired one shot, hitting one of the boys in the back and killing him.

"Did he have the right to shoot him?" and "Should he go to jail?' were something we discussed for about 45 minutes and it was AWESOME.

Anyways, in case you were wondering, this is what the 6th graders decided:

1. You can kill someone if you have a "good" reason. (They couldn't decide who determines whether or not the reason is good. Also, according to them, Ty'Quan not having his homework is not a "good" reason.)

2. You can kill someone if they hit you in your face for no reason.

3. You can kill someone as long as you have witnesses to back up your reasons.

4. You can kill someone if they come to your house and you don't want them to.

5. None of this applies if the person you are planning on killing is a friend or relative of any of my students.

Today Was Better

I guess you get a little perspective when the teacher down the hall ends the day having to be talked out of quitting or the one downstairs spends most of the time crying.

Also, I've never worked for reasonable people before, and it's amazing how far a simple, "I understand your frustration" can go. The school's a mess, nothing has changed, but a big thank you to the people who listen when I voice my concerns and actually make a concerted effort to make things better.

Turns out I'm not crazy after all!

I Kind of Want To Punch Somebody In The Face

Yesterday in our staff meeting after school from the guy who is our "Turnaround Director": "Never, ever yell at these kids. They've already been yelled at. If yelling worked, we wouldn't have to be here turning this school around."

WELL, as my friend Jen (shoutout!) so eloquently put it, "If idiot solutions worked, they also wouldn't be there."

REALLY?! REALLY?! You think you get paid the big bucks to come tell me some moronic thing like, "don't yell" and everything's going to be fixed??

Today was a pretty bad day. Nothing even really happened, my kids are just ALREADY ANNOYING. It's the second damn day of school! When I step out into the hallway or go onto other floors, it looks EXACTLY THE SAME as it has every other year. Kids running the hallway, no consequences.

So, apparently when we went to that summer training, they just wanted to tell us all these things we COULD implement....not that they would help us implement such things. "You could do a Friday Breakfast Club, guys! You could bring in donuts and juice for your students that did well that week!"
Thank you for that genius advice. I would never think of something so smart and wonderful and life-changing all on my own, because I have the brain capacity of a bird. I basically just wandered in off the street to hang out with these short people that I just recently found out are actually not small adults, but something called "children." Whatever would I do without you, my saving grace, my one lifeline to dealing with these people. I am so glad you all get paid so much money to tell me how to interact with kids you don't interact with yourself. Why don't you wander on over to the hospital and give the surgeons tips on a more effective and efficient way to do a heart surgery? And on the way there, why don't you stop by the construction workers and critique their way of laying pavement?.....No?...just me?...I'm the lucky one? Yay, again, I really appreciate your pearls of wisdom.

He's Ready

We had 6th grade orientation on Thursday. After it was over I was standing the hallway talking to an incoming student.

"Hi, What's your name?"

"Corey."

"It's nice to meet you, Corey."

"Do y'all have a hall monitor up at this school?"

"Yes."

"...Is she fast?"

That Was Fast.

So this is a picture of the hundred or so boxes of books that were in the classroom next to me. They are full of textbooks, so each box weighs at least twenty pounds, if not more. They are not science books, but they were in the science teacher's classroom. She had been asking if they were going to get moved anytime soon. She asked the custodian what she was supposed to do. Custodian asked New Principal. New Principal told Custodian that every teacher had to deal with whatever crap was left in their room. (Which makes sense for say, trash or old books...but all of that?)
Days go by, books are still there. The teacher is getting frustrated because the kids come on Monday and she can't get her room together. She keeps pestering various people and no one has anything to say. She starts trying to move the books. (Just to get an idea here, she's about 5'1.) New Principal happens to be walking by and she says, "Hey! Do you want to help me move some books?"
And HEEEEE says, "You know, I got some stuff in my car, you wanna help me bring it in? Or maybe you just want to turn in your resignation over some books."

He walks off, and she gets really upset and starts crying. (This is literally the only interaction he has ever had with this woman. The guy is BRAND NEW!) She continues trying to move the books, all the while crying. The Language Arts teacher down the hall comes out of her room and yells, "Don't you move those books! That is not your damn job! It don't make no damn sense for you to have to move those books!"

New Principal comes around the corner and says, "YOU TWO! In my office NOW!" This man calls the Teacher's Union on them to try and say they are responsible for what is in their classroom. They met in his office for like 45 minutes.

WHAT THE HELL. WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH THESE PEOPLE?! Is it sooooo hard to be a principal in my school building and not be a complete asshole?

A better person might say he's just really stressed out right now and said things he didn't mean out of frustration. And I say, the stress has not arrived. Your frustration will be there Monday morning in the form of 400 children. If you are panicking because teachers are bothering you with legitimate concerns, then let me show you the exit door.

Oh, and it's Thursday and we still have no idea what our schedule looks like, what grade we're teaching, class times, class lists, ANYTHING. We have not had ONE SINGLE MEETING discussing logistics, policies, procedures...any of that.

ANNNNND they spent all this money fixing up the front of the building. Painting, landscaping. I moved to the third floor where all the locks on my cabinets have been ripped out, my door is falling off the hinges and my ceiling tiles are sagging and missing.

Day One: I Hate Everybody

Soooooooooo.....
Our new school is a "Turnaround" school. So far ain't a damn thing been turned around. We were told two weeks ago what our grade assignments were. Today we were told something different and "it may change again, heh heh. You never know, heh heh. You get what I'm sayin' heh heh. Be flexible people." Awesome.

Thank GOODNESS I went in last week (on my own free time) to get my desks out of my old room. Because apparently there aren't enough desks and chairs to go around. Lots of people spent the entire day looking for desks and chairs. The teacher next door to me has ONE HUNDRED BOXES of books in her room that no one will claim responsibility for. She's just sitting in there wondering when she'll be able to put her room together.

Because for the next TWO DAYS we have to go to worthless, worthless Professional Development out of the building. As in, I teach Ancient History but I have to go to a 3 hour Professional Development on one Supreme Court Case (Tinker v. Des Moines). In fact, there aren't even enough Social Studies PD's to last all of both days, so I was told I have to sign up for "something, anything. You just can't come in this building tomorrow or Wednesday." So I'm going to something targeted at Special Educators.

Somehow ALL of my posters got thrown away. Five years worth of me making posters...gone. Very depressing. I might have cried a little.

They told me two weeks ago I was teaching 6th grade. I was SOO HAPPY to have only one grade level. I haven't had one grade level since my first year! It was such a relief! When am I going to learn that never lasts? They told us today that my team will "more than likely" teach 6th and 7th grade....when we will know for sure, they don't know. This is my conversation with new assistant principal:

"Yeah, more than likely both grades....is everyone on your team, like, heartbroken?"

"Yeah, pretty much."

"Well, tell them to get over it. It's only TWO preps. Do you know how many preps I had when I was teachin?!"

"No, but I had four last year....We were just so relieved this year to not have all that extra work. And now, well, we're not relieved anymore."

"Well, it's only two and that's not something you should complain about."

So, that's great. I'm really excited to have yet another administrator who dismisses my concerns because of "all they went through" as a teacher. Because it sucked for you it should suck for me?

My new classroom has basically been a dumping ground for the past two years. I found 5 computer monitors and over 100 random books. It was like that show, "Hoarders."

This does not bode well.

How Much Do I Share?

So last week we had our little training. It was cute how they were so positive.
At one point, we were discussing who our "stakeholders" in the community are. Teachers, Students, Parents, Neighbors, etc. Someone pipes up with "The Criminal Justice System." After all they do have a stake in us, the better we are, the less work they have to do.
One of the new teachers (there are soooo many!) looks alarmed and says, "Why on earth would we have to deal with the criminal justice system?" (oh, you are so cute, new teacher.)
I raise my hand and say, "Well, in an official capacity, you meet with Probation Officers to discuss a student's progress. But we also have several kids who go to jail during the year, who've been in jail, who's immediate family members are or have been in jail."
The presenter (who is in charge of our "school climate" but has never been to our school and actually lives in Houston) quickly interjected with, "Oh! But to be fair, that is a VERY small percentage of students! Maximum 5% right?! And there's never been a bad incident, right?" I said, "NO, not right." And she just said, "Wellll, anyway..." and went on to some blahblahblah.

This guy that worked with me last year stood up and was like, "WAIT A MINUTE. I'm sorry, but I have to say something. If you are going to work at this school next year, you need to know that teachers HAVE been assaulted, cars HAVE been stolen, bad things HAVE happened. You NEED to know that." And he sat down. I'm thinking, THANK YOU. The presenter AGAIN tried to gloss over it.

My question is this, how much do we share? Personally, I think they should know what they're getting into. Don't NOT tell them that Darrell is going to cuss them out...tell them what to do WHEN Darrell cusses them out! I'm not saying be all doom and gloom...I can stories about my sweeties too. But come ON.